done

My friend Ari Moshe shows his love in almond butter. He leaves large
containers full of it at our house, sometimes without even telling us.
Do you know what it means to discover almond butter that magically
appears in your house? For those of you not from Olympia, it would be
like finding a hundred bucks under your pillow from the tooth fairy,
even though you're 38 years old and haven't recently lost any teeth.
I've got a sensitivity to almonds; I can only eat them about every
other day. It's too bad, because I like them a lot. Sometimes they
create sores in my mouth.

A free day! Libre! I have so much "to do" and it's nice for it to be
Sunday December 31 where so many people are doing something else, it
gives me time and space to de-compress, if I can figure out exactly
how one would do that. So, even though I've got two movies that I
could watch here, I look out the window, and decide that it's time to
drop in on a friend who isn't answering my calls ;) and lives
conveniently right near the co-op.

A nice, crisp day, and a walk to the co-op to invigorate my reality.
When I was younger, I communed with nature fairly reguarly, through
the time that I spent away from peopled areas. Now that I'm on my own,
I haven't made that happen for myself as regularly. Somehow I'm able
to channel god-ness through the people around me, which I have a
feeling is easier to do in Olympia than many other places. If I were
living in Omaha, I think I'd probably get away a lot more.
But that feeling! Actually experiencing weather, being among the
wilds. I need a week in the outdoors sometime soon.
My new year's resolution is this: From now on, I will spend Sukkot in
the wilderness (a sukkot backpacking trip, perhaps). I will make a
ramshackle structure from the materials lying around in the woods,
like I learned to do when I was a child. I will build myself a
wilderness-fort to sleep and eat in.

Recently I have started to stress out a little about Shared Route, but
I'm learning how to get support when that happens. I am just now
beginning to experience the roots of the workaholism that capitalism
has thrust so effectively upon the Jewish people (as well as so many
others!) I breathe, "Ah, this is why shabbat was created." For people
like me, who can't figure out how to chill out, what that would
entail, how to engage in a positive relaxing activity (ie meditation),
or even how to JUST WALK AWAY FROM THE COMPUTER.

In Portland, I get confronted more intensely with my stress than I do
in Olympia; in Olympia, I can bury myself in friends more easily, in
Portland I spend time with people I grew up with; this is its own form
of stress. Not to say that it can't be great because sometimes it is.
My parents take me out to eat *a lot*. But sometimes I feel shaky,
stressed-out, and I know that I dealt with that growing up by playing
computer games (ie detaching from the world), but my world is so
incredibly attached right now it's hard for me to rely on that
particular crutch. Or sugar, because I notice how it affects my
health.

I read over my last update-email; so polly-anna! I almost never
recognize my own writing. Catherine asked me a couple weeks ago if I
notice that I look different all the time. I told her that I notice,
but that other people tend not to mention it to me. I am a
shape-shifter, in so many ways! The astrological reading Ari Moshe
gave me a while back confirms this; my pluto and sun are conjunct (ie
my outward manifestation is transformation).

I tried convincing a friend to never criticize himself ever again,
last night. It's amazing how important it can seem to people (and it
did to me just a few short years ago) to criticize people, especially
themselves, as if that would actually achieve some functional goal as
lofty as "evaluation." Or, greater understanding. My experience is
that I still am really good at evaluating, without criticism. Probably
better.

In related news, I've become the president of my neighborhood
association, which I think is funny. I hope to hold a lot of potlucks
for the neighborhood, that's my main goal. A potluck with 200 people
at it. That would be so cool. Too bad I'll be gone for two months
(Israel/Palestine in Feb/March!), I'll have to leave things in the
hands of my trusty veep. I know she'll do great.

Let's see, also Chanuka was a lot of fun, had one party here, and went
to two other parties in Oly, and my mom's for last night of Chanuka,
I've driven the bus Portland-Seattle-Portland twice in the last 10
days, we had our most income yesterday while I was driving. Christmas
was awesome- I've been wearing my yamika a lot, we went out to Thai
food (I don't know any good Chinese restaurants in Oly) on Christmas
eve, and went to a Fiddler on the Roof sing-along at the independent
theater downtown on the 25th. Co-counseling remains good, and
challenging, and frustrating.

Okay, time to go for that walk to the co-op.

shalom y'all,
Jacob

hm

Wow! I am in debt. To y'all, to the creator; I owe words! I owe writings!

And now I sit in my hostel, in Jonah's room actually, because my desk
is rarely clean enough to sit at, to type at, and all the time that I
spend sitting on my bed (on the ground) doesn't seem like the best
thing to do for my body. It's rather uncomfortable.

All by way of saying, I'm sitting at Jonah's desk, and typing. Here at
the hostel, there is something of a culture of shared space; our
living room, kitchen, common use computer, our breakfast nook and full
bathroom, they are all uncommonly common spaces.

So many emails! My latest venture, Shared Route, has taken off in a
number of ways, not the least of which is an article my friend Raymond
submitted to the Willamette Week:
http://www.wweek.com/editorial/3303/8256/

Life is settling down a little bit, after an east coast jaunt and a
cross-country journey. FIRST, I went to this thing called "Jews in the
Woods" that was held in Pittsfield, MA. It was a shabbat with a bunch
of college age kids; more Jews, and less woods than I was expecting.
Davening was very central; it was harder to organize a walk. One thing
that was great was to have a good co-counselor friend there with me.

Afterwards I spent some time in Boston, especially with Joseph Berman
who is studying at Hebrew College in a transdenominational rabbinical
program. And I spent a little time in Providence, where Anat,
Shulamit, and Maya live, who I met at Jews in the Woods. They are
really really awesome.

Then I bought a minibus. It was Monday, and I was supposed to fly back
Thursday. I canceled my ticket, made my way down to Philly (where the
minibus was that I bought), and stayed there for the next shabbos.
With Maya! Who's studying at the Reconstructionist Rabbinical College.
And I ran into my old roommate Annah there, that was special.

New York for a few days, including time with my business partner
Benjamin's family (without Benjamin), right around Thanksgiving. For
the day of, I ate lunch at a vegan restaurant with a good friend down
on 4th and B in the City. I wasn't feeling up for negotiating my
dietary needs that day. I headed out, in a minibus, along with JT, who
was moving to Seattle from the lower east side. Two days prior, we had
filled up the minibus with all his crap- there was very little room
available.

First stop was to pick up Mike and Sully, styrofoam replicas of the
animated characters from Monsters, Inc. These guys clocked in at 2.5
feet and 7 feet tall respectively. It was all we could do to get them
on board, after detaching Sully's arms. They were going from Mays
Landing, NJ to Tacoma. Then stayed the night in Philly, with Annah's
brother Will who is SO gracious and SO nice and welcoming, a true
mensch, if not a Jewish Mother!

Then picked up some more boxes. going from Philly to Phillipsburg, KS.
We were only about to take about 1/3 of the boxes that I was hoping.
Next stop, State College area, to pick up 4 winter tires heading for
Pocatello, ID. That day, we went to an amazing burrito place with
vegan options in Harrisburg that I recommend highly. They even have
about 8 choices of type of tortilla (sundried tomato, spinach,
jalepeno cheese, whole wheat, etc.) which I thought was brilliant and
tasty. I am so thankful for the people in my life who had the patience
and ability to offer me ground support while I trekked westward- a few
hours before our next meal, I'd call Benjamin, or my mother, or
someone at the hostel, who would look up vegetarian restaurants for me
in that town. I did the same thing in order to procure biodiesel along
the way.

Second night, made it all the way to Bloomington, IN, where I had the
good fortune to spend a morning with Lucy Elizabeth! It seemed like
ages since I had seen her, and she seemed well indeed. After a stop
off at the posh co-op (from a dumpster-diver's point-of-view), we hit
the road and made lawrence, ks for dinnertime with joe carr and marta!
A lovely newish friend that I met last time I breezed through
Lawrence, and who I got to come to Jews in the Woods with me. Friends,
friends, everywhere. A wonderful night, and morning, complete with
Greg and Cory: old friends from Olympia. The next day we made the
drop-off in KS, and made it as far as Rock Springs, where we pulled in
to the motel sometime before 3 am. In conversations with my father I
heard about the "winter storm" that was going to cover the pacific
northwest the next morning.

Not a bad motel. We got up early, 8-ish, and hit the road to get to
Pocatello to drop the tires. Just inside Utah, there was some funny
white smoke that came in the interior vent; we stopped, took it to a
mechanic shop, and waited two hours to find out that there was nothing
wrong. Must've been some coolant that burned off or something.
We were negotiating snow all the way to Pocatello, and from Pocatello
to Boise it got thicker, the roads slicker. Between Boise (sundown)
and Pendleton (1:30 am?) there was a lot of ice on the roads, and we
could only go about 30 or 40 mph. We made it through, and to Portland,
to stay at my mother's house, around 5:20 am. Whew.

Got JT and the monsters to their appropriate home (although I think
maybe we lost a little piece of styrofoam that belonged to Sully;
oops). Got home, hung out for a second, then went to an "Owning Class"
Co-Counseling Workshop south of Portland. I expected it to be a very
difficult workshop, but it ended up being great!

The last great thing that I want to tell you about right now is that
my relationship with Catherine is really nice. We spend nights
together a couple times a week, and it's a really low-key, mutually
supportive relationship. Neither of have said we know what we want in
a longer-term sense. I certainly don't.

Here's to the sea! And here's to the me.

Shalom y'all,
Jacob

yeah, yeah, I'll start writing more often (rolls eyes)